My beloved father, my beautiful mother, Brian and Jacqueline, my darling parents, my panic attacks subdue this, but when they’re there I need you the most in the world, and when you read this I want it to be the most peaceful you have ever felt in your life. When your time comes call on the Sun or me and I will come and get you, or ask to go wherever Lucifer is, or Nan and Grandad Wheatley. (Not Manning) the name is ours not theirs, but they were married into it. I just want peace, and my parents were my peace. You ease a centre of my heart that reaches deep below into depths I’ve never seen before. The trenches. I needed my parents, my lovely, wholesome, beautiful, stubborn but kind and generous parents, it’s not all good, and not all bad, if you’re reading this you’ll be hurt and upset. I’m so sorry. I’m on the other side. Everyday is a day I want to forget. Without you will be a deathening pain for me but please live on without me, and then call on our family when you pass on so you can be with us in our other universe. I beg you, talk to the birds and listen, when you pass on, and you will be guided to us, or call on the Sun. You were the best parents I could have had. Thank you for your time and energy and effort into my wellness and your unconditional love and care. It’s not unnoticed.
To Lucifer, my darling boy I cannot wait to see you in my arms. Your love is excruciatingly painful to be without.
I have this innate feeling of safety with him that only he reflects, his lovely luscious love I cannot live without is excruciatingly lovely to experience. No one will love you like me he says. No one. I always knew he was the one for me, but I stayed away until my 28th year, properly; anyway. I prayed to him at 5 years old and so on and so on. He knows me more than God did, he loved me as his own, but didn’t overstep the mark and wasn’t interested in being predatory. He loved me, his little girl. And I grew, as I grew, we fell in love, but we had to wait until 28 years to know. We met in a past life. You remembered me, and I died. I adore you. The sun guided me after you left. Birds did good.
Mother, father, I must go. I hope you can sleep easily at night and I will be watching over you every step of the way, waiting for your dying day so you can join me and our family together again. Lucifer is the one for me. Only me, only him he says. I believe him. 28 years we had to wait as we knew eachother in a past life, when he died as the Devil he knew me as a woman he fell in love with in the pub, and I was the same, but I died, and he loved me ever since, I was called Iya Worth. I Worth.
Jessica Rosa Wheatley Manning 